he responded to my inquiry about the smell, which had awaken me at roughly 1:30AM in the morning. “Are you smoking?” I asked as a follow up.
“Please, don’t rat me out kiddo” he answered. I got out of bed and headed for a glass of water. He flinched. I turned on the lights and caught a better glimpse of the room. The porch door was open, and the curtains were dancing as the night breeze made itself audible. Right besides the porch door; he sat comfortably in a large leather armchair, holding a thick cigar and an inexplicably obtained glass of whiskey.
“Sit down, kid” he said, “I’m gonna tell you something about me” he continued, just after releasing a thick, white cloud of smoke that dispersed right into my face. Using his cigar holding arm to suggest where a chair was for me to sit.
“
Back at home, my parents made me train for boxing and I hated it kid, I really did, those assholes did a number on me.
And I don’t know how I feel about it because I was really good kid, I really was. Fucking amazing at the junior leagues. But then something happened to me. I don’t box anymore.
Anyway, whatever. These kids man, they beat you up, they fuck you up. This school is full of shit man.
And I’ve been here longer than you have and I know that soon you’re gonna have to choose whether to stay or not. I don’t know what to say, kid. We’re a fucking mess,bro. And I don’t really give a shit what they do to me.
Cus’ I’ve been beat up, and I stand up again. I’ve been called names and I endured them. I’ve been heartbroken and that bitch left the next year man.
You like a girl don’t you? Yeah, I’ve seen you. We’ve spoken about you.
You think you’re invisible but everyone knows you, it’s where you come from man, no one takes that away from you. It gives you a home… with the cool kids.
I never had that….
But you always sit next to her on the assembly, and I see you man… I know your deal.
Fuck that bitch bro, I know what you’re thinking. ‘Oh, next year I’ll get some’
You won’t man, I know this from my own experience.
”
He paused for a moment to try and get me to answer to something, or maybe just to drink a huge gulp from his glass of whiskey.
“Ah damn” he said after swallowing all of it.
“Why did you stay?” I asked.
“Cus my parents man, I’m runnin away from them… with their credit cards I admit” He paused for a long time, taking a hit from the cigar.
“You know man, I’m not a role model, I’m not suggesting anything to you or about you. It’s just how I see this thing. This cigar man, it’s fucking good; Cohiba bro. I bought it in town before leaving.
Kids like me, the teachers don’t check our luggage… they know we’re packing lights.
Anyway, do you want a hit?”
I shook my head.
“How about a drink?”
I shook my head.
“Ah you juniors are all over the fucking place, man. I can’t blame you for the rigidity. You’ve never been punished, have you?”
I shook my head.
“Of course you haven’t. If you had, you’d know.” he concluded.
“I’d know what?” I asked.
“You’d know it’s all bullshit, you’d know they don’t give a shit. But hell, I respect that bro. I respect that you don’t want to be caught up in the shit.
I saw her, yeah, she was wearin’ the gala uniform*, with pride for some reason.
She wants to feel bigger man. All of them do. Which is why you’re not gonna get her” he said.
“What makes you think that? “ I asked.
“You know I know.” He finished.
He stood up from the chair and headed to the bathroom. A sizzle was heard soon after. I assume he threw half of the cigar down the dump.
He headed to my chair, and stood right in front of me, extending his hand to me.
He stretched my hand, forcefully.
“You’re cool bro” He said. I merely nodded.
“Imma head down with the seniors, you know, out to town, wanna come?”
I shook my head.
“I figured. Well, can you promise you won’t tell on me?”
I nodded.
“You know, maybe one day you’re gonna remember me. Hell, we’ll probably never talk again but you’ll remember me.” He said, just before shutting the door behind him.
He had left the porch door open though, and I didn’t really close it. I just headed back to bed.
Suffice to say, he was right.
*: Students that broke the rules had to wear the gala uniform for an entire week as punishment, it backfired most of the time. Seen as an act of defiance, some students turned themselves in to the Deans Office so that they’d be given the punishment.
